Many Warriors spend between 4 and 40 years of their life serving, and then quit. After a storied, good, or bad career of training, schooling, leading, and possibly a deployment or five they simply quit. Why is it? Hold on before you get your undies in a bunch. I’m not saying that when you leave military service you are a quitter. We all have to leave sometime.
I am implying that many will quit SERVING after they leave service even though there are a ton of opportunities to. Serving doesn’t just mean wearing a uniform. A Warrior does not quit serving their Nation and its citizens simply because the guy at the Central Issue Facility took in your cleaned-up load bearing equipment and was the final person to sign off on your out-processing form. Ok, I guess I wasn’t implying it. I came right out and said it. If you have been following my blog (subscribe below) you would know that I am pretty forthcoming with my thoughts.
First, let’s look at why Warriors join the military before we dive into why they quit serving. A study done by Krebs & Ralston showed that 43% of people who join the military do so out of a sense of patriotism or duty. The rest for employment or out of desperation. So, let’s talk about the 43% who said they joined because they wanted to be hooah. The other 57% percent, while great Americans, didn’t sign up forever. Many want a unique set of skills. Some sign up for the education. Some sign up because they need a job or have no other options. We all have buddies whose options were the Marine Corps or jail.
But 43%, said that they did it out of a desire to serve, very admirable. So, why do most quit serving after they take off the uniform? If it was so important to risk your life, your health, your relationships, your everything, why was it no longer important after you shredded your Common Access Card?
And what am I talking about when I say “serving?” I am talking about doing for others, doing for your Nation, doing for your communities, and doing for your brethren. Let’s look at the best example I can give you, the first SGM Bean, my Dad. SGMB1 served his country all of his life. But not just in military uniform. My Dad worked and volunteered so much of his time to this great land that his sacrifice can never truly be repaid. When he wasn’t on duty, which was often, he also was a dispatcher for the local police and State Police. He was actually struck by lightning once while on the phone taking a call but still managed to finish his shift. He also worked as a Deputy Game Warden during the busy hunting seasons like deer and bear where, while trying to apprehend some deer jackers, his partner drove their blacked-out car into a rock forcing my Dad’s un-seatbelted head into the dash and his tobacco pipe down his throat. When he wasn’t doing that, he was likely at a Rotary Club meeting or helping somebody work on their car at Cassady’s Garage.
He did all this, along with serving in uniform for 42 years until he was riddled with cancer, retired, and died. Many, including me at one point, will ask why. Why work your entire life, giving, just to die 3 months after you retire? That is a valid question that I had as well. I once swore I would not be like my father and work until I died, as if he had done something wrong. It was my line of thinking that was wrong.
It was a few years after my own retirement while I was working as a Department of the Army civilian that I realized I was the biggest dummy in the world. My Dad’s way of thinking was right. Why wouldn’t you work your whole life if your work was helping others? Why wouldn’t you serve others if you could? Why wouldn’t you devote your entire 80 plus years to helping mankind in one form or another. If you were willing to lay down your very life, as a sacrifice for others, why wouldn’t you spend your life doing the same? Let’s talk about 4 reasons why.
First, some just aren’t able to due to physical or mental disabilities Odin’s glorious Army gave them. And that is so very unfortunate. Those who demonstrated such fortitude and courage would help this grateful Nation so much if they were able to keep doing what they obviously love. But, there are many that will have to spend the rest of their life simply caring for themselves or being cared for. While I don’t pity them, because they would not want that, I pity us who will not get to have them be productive members of society for life.
Second, some of the ones who are part of the 57% signed up for the employment or out of desperation, per the study. While they are great Americans for serving for however long they did and sacrificing however much they did, their plan was to do their time, get some mad skills, and move back into Chapter 3 of their life with other things to do.
Third, and this will shake some trees, are those who are still trying to get more from our Nation because of their service. Don’t furrow your brow at me. You know that guy or girl. The guy who complains when Applebee’s doesn’t also give him free dessert on Veterans’ Day. The girl who complains when Delta airlines doesn’t give her a discount on her airfare. Or even better, the guy who refuses to shop at Home Depot because “I have to show my ID every time to get my discount.” They spend their lives not working and relying on the collective support of good citizens, nonprofits and the government. Like the guy who gets 100% medical and 100% VA plus disability from Uncle Sugar along with but when he CHOSE to move he had a nonprofit pay his moving expenses “because they should.” But I digress. These are the people who won’t continue serving because the world owes them, why should they give back? These brethren have lost their way.
Last, are the people who just don’t know they quit serving. They are likely doing their best to transition, maybe struggling with a new career or college or relationships and are simply a little whelmed with life. Not overwhelmed, just whelmed. These are the people I want to reach out to. I get it. Life can feel overwhelming. New job, different city, home with the family more, doing less PT but more drinking. There just doesn’t seem like enough time. I have been there. Hell, I might still be there.
After I left the Army, and started working for them, and my crayon-eating brethren, I also founded and ran a nonprofit for almost 9 years with some truly great people, including Household 6. But eventually, I became one of the people I spoke about last. I was overwhelmed. I had lost my Mother, Saint Jeanne Bean. I was running the MA nonprofit from SC which added to the stress. And my wife’s Mother and Stepfather were in hospice in our care. Actually, in our home using our bedroom for awhile. I was way whelmed and had to step down, which unfortunately caused the closing of my baby, The Warrior Thunder Foundation. That was in 2018, almost 3 years ago. Since then, I have done little outside of my job helping get good gear in the hands of our troops through the help of our partners who employ people with disabilities and vision impairment. But over the last month, I have started volunteering wih a local nonprofit for Veterans again. My job is certainly serving. It gives back a ton. But there is always more to do. And while I understand that I may have been lost, I regret it.
So, which one of the four people are you? Or are you still serving? Are you active in your church? Do you coach Little League? Are you an Active member of Veterans’ group? Are you a teacher? Are you a law enforcement officer? Do you work for the one of the Services as a civilian? Do you work in the Defense industry serving our great Warriors? Are you in the medical profession? I could go on but I think you get the point. Your serving shouldn’t stop when you crumple up your utility uniform into a ball in your spare closet. I’m not telling you that your sacrifice, your service, wasn’t awesome or patriotic or selfless. I’m telling you to not stop doing good for your fellow human. I’m telling you to keep doing it. Not only will you be serving your fellow citizen, but you will be doing good for your mental and physical well being.
There are a lot of opportunities out there. You have a lot of great skills, technical and in leadership. This Nation needs you. Your neighbors need you. This country was founded and is led by greatness. Well, not politicians. Business, nonprofits, Little League, your Rotary Club, your church all need you. And YOU need you. Remember how great it was doing this Nation’s work? Standing up against bullies? Protecting those who needed protection? Only the severity and horrible conditions have changed. Google™ nonprofits in your area or find something that you like to do and a way to help others do it.
It is time to un-quit serving. I am sure that whatever cause you choose it will be as rewarding. Helping is good. For everyone.
—SGM DTB—
